The entire situation didn't really unsettle me to tell you the truth. In fact, I slept better at night knowing that our household was being protected from the possibility of sudden gaggle attack.

Every morning at 3:17 am, she would assume her post with a devotion befitting of a Medieval monk. None of my neighbors had a sentinel that specialized in Cenozoic goose tactics, and that made me feel vastly superior to them–I actually pitied them.

Granted, the area I lived in was devoid of geese, but, as she eloquently mentioned one night during severe fornication: "The gaggles are looming, while you are snoozing." Having heard such prophetic words, I took her into my harem, and designated her: Brigadier General of My Backyard.

Let it be known, The Dragon Master is Commander in Chief of his ménage, and of his womén.